Trusting in God can be a challenge. I know, I’m living proof! I’ve been struggling with living up to a vow that I made to God to allow Him to do with me as He pleases. As I retired from a career in banking, back in 2011, to pursue education and work related to evangelization, I gave my life to God. Yet, the bills need to be paid. So how does one ascertain how to live up to the vow and pay the bills? During Lent, I sought solace to this conundrum in the Sacrament of Reconciliation. For my penance, the priest asked me to read anything from the Gospel of Luke. Since we were near Holy Week, I thought I would read the Passion Narrative.
My Challenge to Trusting in God
Before I started to read, I chatted with God, letting Him know that I was having difficulty ascertaining His will for me. How am I supposed to know for certain that I am pursuing my career path in accordance with His will? I struggle in knowing that what I do each day is what He wants from me, given the challenges that come my way. (Let’s remember that as a Catholic blogger, Catholic public speaker, editor of Catholic manuscripts, Catholic author, and Adjunct Professor of Theology, I basically work for God). Therefore, trusting in God can be a challenge because everyone knows that when you work for God, the benefits are great, but the wages are low. Bottom line: How do I fulfill God’s plan for me and pay the bills at the same time?
Once I got everything off my chest, I opened the missal and began reading from the Gospel of Luke. Then God hit me with a two-by-four when I read:
“When I sent you forth without a money bag or a sack or sandals, were you in need of anything?” “No, nothing,” they replied” (Luke 22:35).
Bam! There I was, sitting in the pews of my Church, bawling my eyes out. For, I had to respond just as the Apostles responded. I needed nothing. So, what have I been so worried about? Then I asked Jesus, “What do you want from me?” Oh, if you could have heard the exasperation in His voice when He responded, “I just want for you to trust Me.”
God’s Way is the Best Way
I detest uncertainty and dislike adversity. Yet, Jesus wants me to trust in Him, without knowing how, or when, to take the next step; knowing that I will face adversity along the way. Yes, trusting in God can be a challenge. But. I’ll tell you this: I wouldn’t want it any other way, than God’s way. So, with faith, I keep plugging along, finding ways to show my trust in God. And you know what, He always comes through!
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